she's gonna (cake) pop

Once, there was a lovely girl named Sadie.
And she was going to have a baby.
So another lovely girl, Ashley, decided to host a party for Sadie.
Since good things come in threes, this blog is actually about another girl: Me.
Maybe someone would call me lovely, too.

One of the ways I like to show my love for people is to bake (or cook) for them, so I offered to bring a treat. Because the theme of the baby shower was "She's Gonna Pop," I decided to take cake pops. You know how you're never supposed to serve food that you've never made before? Well....I tend to jump in with both feet - and ask questions later (if ever).

Given the number of expected guests, I decided to make two varieties: brownie pops and red velvet cake pops.

I give you my first-ever recipe tutorial.

The brownie pops are super simple. Start with a pan of brownies. Prepare as directed on the box. (Or make from scratch, if you're one of those people. Ha. It just doesn't seem worth it to me if you're going to smoosh them.)

Once out of the oven, let them cool until they're easy to handle, then smoosh into balls. Make sure you've washed your hands obsessively. You'll touch these a lot by the time they're done.

Put a sucker stick into each ball.  Put a sucker stick into one brownie ball, then realize you got fingerprints all over the stick. Ask your husband (or nearest person with clean hands) to put the rest of the sticks in place.

Freeze until solid.

For the red velvet cake, bake as usual, then add cream cheese frosting. Mush the two things together. Again - clean your hands! You know you have the right consistency when it looks less like a delicious dessert and more like the prop department of a horror movie. 

Repeat steps above so you have another set of frozen, naked pops.

Next - and this is crucial - totally forget your plan to make a tutorial on your blog. Skip many, many steps.

Once you've completely forgotten to take photos, add dye to the almond bark (coating) so you can match the theme of the baby shower. If you're feeling really crazy, do not connect the dots of logic.... The dye you bought is 90% water. Add it to your almond bark, and watch science do its thing.

The result is a very colorful substance that you cannot dip the pops into. Basically, you'll have a less-pliable fondant. At this point, your only option is to use the "fondant" to create an Amelie cake pop.

Look at the clock. If you've followed my instructions, you will notice that it is 11:30 pm the night before the party. Laugh and laugh at the pickle you've once again gotten yourself into. Sleep on it.

The next morning, fashion a poor man's piping bag out of a Ziploc. Fill with frosting and dye. (The frosting is safe from the wrath of the dye.) Decorate the pops and insert into the holder your husband made.

Finish decorating the pops as you pull on your sliders and run out the door to the party.
Forget your camera.
Arrive two minutes early.
Beg for photos from the amazing hostess.

Finally, look forward to the next time you can make cake pops so you can apply all these lessons learned.